SOUTHERN …for all of us that were born, raised, and our friends that have transplanted to the South!

SOUTHERN WOMEN

Southern women know their summer weather report:

  • Humidity
  • Humidity
  • Humidity 

Southern women know their vacation spots:

  • The beach
  • The rivuh
  • The crick 

Southern women know everybody’s first name:

  • Honey
  • Darlin’
  • Shugah 

Southern women know the movies that speak to their hearts:

  • Fried Green Tomatoes
  • Driving Miss Daisy
  • Steel Magnolias
  • Gone With The Wind 

Southern women know their religions:

  • Baptist
  • Methodist
  • Football 

Southern women know their cities dripping with Southern charm:

  • Chawl’stn
  • S’vanah
  • Foat Wuth
  • N’awlins
  • Addlanna 

Southern women know their elegant gentlemen:

  • Men in uniform
  • Men in tuxedos
  • Rhett Butler 

Southern girls know their prime real estate:

  • The Mall
  • The Country Club
  • The Beauty Salon 

Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins:

  • Having bad hair and nails
  • Having bad manners
  • Cooking bad food 

SOUTHERNISMS

Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don’t “HAVE” them, you “PITCH” them.

Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up “a mess.”

Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of “yonder.”

Only a Southerner knows exactly how long “directly” is, as in: “Going to town, be back directly.”

Even Southern babies know that “Gimme some sugar” is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.

All Southerners know exactly when “by and by” is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.

Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who’s got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor’s trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!

Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between “right near” and “a right far piece.” They also know that “just down the road” can be 1 mile or 20

Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol’ boy, and po’ white trash.

No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.

A Southerner knows that “fixin” can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.

Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, …. and when we’re “in line,”… we talk to everybody!

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they’re related, even if only by marriage.

In the South, y’all is singular, all y’all is plural.

Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.

Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.

When you hear someone say, “Well, I caught myself lookin’,” you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!

Only true Southerners say “sweet tea” and “sweet milk.” Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it — we do not like our tea unsweetened. “Sweet milk” means you don’t want buttermilk.

And a true Southerner knows you don’t scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,”Bless her heart” … and go your own way.

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Humor…Grandmas don’t know everything…

Grandmas don’t know everything..

Little Tony was 7 years old and was staying with his grandmother for a few days.

He’d been playing outside with the other kids for a while when he came into the house and asked her,

‘Grandma, what’s that called when two people sleep in the same room and one is on top of the other?’

She was a little taken aback, but she decided to tell him the truth. ‘It’s called sex, darling.’

Little Tony said, ‘Oh, OK,’ and went back outside to play with the other kids.

A few minutes later he came back in and said angrily, ‘Grandma, it isn’t called sex. It’s called Bunk Beds. And Jimmy’s mom wants to talk to you.’

Greater Nashville Home Sales Continue Recent Trends; Pending Sales Reach 2000

There were 1,783 home closings reported for the month of May, according to figures provided by the Greater Nashville Association of REALTORS®. This figure represents a 28.9 percent decrease compared with 2,508 closings in May of 2008.

Year-to-date closings are down compared to last with year with 7,149. That is a 31.2 percent decrease compared to the 10,406 closings reported through May 2008.

There were 2,000 sales pending at the end of May, compared with 2,489 pending sales at this time last year.  The average number of days on the market for a single-family home was 92 days.

The median residential price for a single-family home during May was $169,900 and for a condominium it was $156,250.  This compares with last year’s median residential and condominium prices of $189,975 and $159,000, respectively.

Inventory at the end of May was 25,096, down from 24,598 in 2008.

This is the first time since September of last year that we have seen pending sales at the 2,000 level ,” Nichols added.  “For buyers, this is a very important time.  Many factors remain in their favor with interest rates low, inventory plentiful and even support from government programs.  However, those factors will not remain that way indefinitely. If interest rates increase, that could add significantly to the cost of a home.   So, acting now would be to their advantage.  For sellers, making their homes attractive and pricing them properly is critical to getting them sold.“

Source:   Greater Nashville Association of REALTORS®

Humor…Top 10 Golf Caddy Comments!

#10 Golfer: “I think I am going to drown myself in the lake.”
Caddy: “Think you can keep your head down that long?”

#9 Golfer: “I’d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.
Caddy: “Try heaven, you’ve already moved most of the earth.”

#8 Golfer: “Do you think that my game is improving?”
Caddy: “Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now.”

#7 Golfer: “Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?”
Caddy: “Eventually!”

#6 Golfer: “You got to be the worst caddy in the world.”
Caddy: “I don’t think so sir. That would be too much of a coincidence.”

#5 Golfer: “Please stop checking your watch all the time.”
Caddy: “It’s not a watch, it is a compass.”

#4 Golfer: “How do you like my game?”
Caddy: “Very good sir, but personally I prefer golf..”

#3 Golfer: “Do you think it is a sin to play on Sunday?”
Caddy: “The way you play, sir, it is a sin on any day.”

#2 Golfer: “This is the worst course I’ve ever played on.”
Caddy: “This isn’t the golf course. We left that an hour ago.”

AND THE #1 BEST CADDY COMMENT …

Golfer: “That can’t be my ball, it is too old.”
Caddy: “It’s been a long time since we teed off, sir.”

Top 10 Mistakes to Avoid in Home Landscaping Design!

Landscape WebSuccess in home landscape design is certainly attainable for do-it-yourselfers, but there are some pitfalls that should be avoided if maximum satisfaction is to be achieved. Thus the need for this list of 10 mistakes to be avoided in home landscape design. The mistakes covered range from miscalculations that have practical ramifications to more subtle errors that negatively impact your enjoyment of your home landscape design.

  1. Piecemeal Planting: Failure to Have a Plan
  2. Having a Lawn Just Because “Everyone Else Does It”
  3. Insufficient Fall Color in Your Home Landscape Design
  4. Lack of Winter Interest in Your Home Landscape Design
  5. Failure to Irrigate
  6. Planting on a Hillside Prone to Erosion
  7. Failure to Work With What You Have
  8. Failure to Incorporate Deer-Resistant Plants in Your Home Landscape Design
  9. You Never Get Anything Done in the Yard Because Tools Are Never Handy
  10. Forgetting Functionality in Home Landscape Design

Source:  about.com, landscaping

Fishing Trip? A joke to share this Saturday morning!

My friend’s husband recently called home one Friday morning and told his wife, Anne, he’d been asked to fly to Canada with his boss and some friends for several days of fishing.  

Anne was a little taken back, but her husband insisted that this was a good opportunity to get that promotion he’d been wanting. 

She relented, and agreed to pack clothes for a the weekend, and even climb up into the attic for his rod and tackle box. 

He told Anne they’d be leaving around 4:30pm and said he’d swing by the house to pick up his things. 

At the end of the conversation he added, “Oh, please pack my new silk pajamas too.” 

Now Anne thought this all sounded a little odd, but went ahead with the packing. 

Sunday evening when her husband returned looking tired, she asked if he caught many fish.

He said they had caught Walleyes, Bass and Pike.  Then he asked, “How come you didn’t pack my blue silk PJ’s?”

Anne, with a sly smile said, “I did, they’re in your tackle box!

Nashville: Life is good! Places to go, things to do!

MY FAVORITES!  The Nashville area offers our visitors and fellow Nashvillians a wide variety of places to visit and enjoy great food!   We are blessed to have so much to choose from but here are a few of my favorite destinations.  Enjoy and welcome to Middle Tennessee!

LINK:  Life is good!  places to go,  things to do.