LITTLE JOHNNY, THE FIREMAN
A man walking on the sidewalk noticed Little Johnny was a block ahead wearing a red fireman’s hat and sitting in a red wagon. It appeared that the wagon was being pulled slowly by a large black Labrador Retriever.
When he got closer to the lad, he noticed that Little Johnny had a rope tied around the dog’s testicles, which probably accounted for why the dog was walking so gingerly.
Smiling, he spoke to the little boy, “That’s really a nice fire engine you have there, son. But I’ll bet the dog would pull you faster if you tied that rope around his neck.”
“Yeah,” Johnny replied, “but then I wouldn’t have a siren.”
LITTLE JOHNNY, CLASS TRIVIA
It was the end of the school year. The teacher had turned in her grades; there was nothing really for the class to do. All the kids were restless and it was near the end of the day. So the teacher thought of an activity.
She said, “The first ones to answer correctly the questions I ask may leave early today.”
Little Johnny said to himself, “Good, I’m smart and I want to get outta here.”
The teacher asked, “Who said ‘Four Score and Seven Years Ago’?”
Before Johnny could open his mouth, Susie said, “Abraham Lincoln.”
The teacher said, “That’s right Susie. You may go.”
Johnny was really mad that Susie had answered first.
The teacher asked, “Who said ‘I Have a Dream’?”
But before Johnny could open his mouth, Mary said, “Martin Luther King!”
The teacher said, “That’s right, Mary. You may go.”
Johnny was even madder than before because Mary had answered first.
Then the teacher asked, “Who said ‘Ask not what your country can do for you’?”
Before Johnny could open his mouth, Nancy piped, “John Kennedy!” and the teacher said, “That’s right, Nancy. you may go.”
Now Johnny was furious!
The teacher turned her back, and Johnny muttered, “I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut!”
The teacher spun around. “WHO SAID THAT?”
Johnny said, “Bill Clinton, can I go now?”