Kenneth Bargers Blog

Friday Humor: A Blonde’s Perspective (2 jokes)

PREGNANT BLONDE

The other day my neighbor, who is blonde, came running up to me in the driveway jumping for joy! 

I didn’t know why she was jumping so excitedly but I thought, ‘what the heck’ and I starting jumping up and down along with her. 

She said, “I have some really great news!”

I said, “Great. Tell me why you’re so happy.”

She stopped jumping and breathing heavily from all the jumping up and down, told me that she was pregnant.

I knew she’d been trying for a while so I told her, “That’s great I couldn’t be happier for you!”

Then she said, “There’s more.”

I asked, “What do you mean there’s more?”

She said, “Well, we are not having just one baby.

We are going to have TWINS!”

Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant,

I asked her how she knew. She said….

“Well, that was the easy part. I went to Sam’s Club and they actually had a home pregnancy kit in a TWIN-pack.  Both tests came out positive!”

BLONDE PUZZLE

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, “Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can’t figure out how to get started.”

Her boyfriend asks, “What is it supposed to be when it’s finished?”

The blonde says, “According to the picture on the box, it’s a rooster.”

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says,

“First of all, no matter what we do, we’re not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster.”

He takes her hand and says, “Second, I want you to relax. Let’s have a nicecup of tea, and then,” he said with a deep sigh. .. . … .. ..

“Let’s put all the Corn Flakes back in the box.”

August 14, 2009 - Posted by kbargers | entertainment, humor | friday funnies, humor, jokes, kenneth bargers